The Prefect's Bathroom
by thatkidthatfedyoutoaquig
Summary: This is a series of James/Snape that all take place in the prefect's bathroom. They're not really connected. There are also undertones of Remus/Sirius. :3
1. One

One

Severus Snape was lurking around the dungeons, bored out of his mind, but not willing to socialize with any of the other Slytherin fifth years. They were just a bunch of morons. Ever since Lucius Malfoy had left the school, Severus had no people he was willing to spend time with.

"Snivellus, so nice to see you!"

"Get out of here, Potter. No one wants your fat ass in here."

"But, dear Snivellus, I've only some to see you. I mean no harm." James Potter faked innocence, widening his big hazel eyes and placing a tan hand on his lean chest. "Honest."

"Hmm. That's nice. And, uh, what do you want from me?"

"Besides your body? I'd fancy a walk with you, actually. Would you mind?"

Snape flushed crimson and folded his arms across his chest, feeling self-conscious of his skin-and-bones body. What the hell was James getting at anyway? "So, you fancy me, huh, Potter?" he sneered.

"Why wouldn't I?" James asked, still sounding innocent.

"I don't know. Maybe because you hate me and I hate you."

"I've never hated you."

Severus's jaw unhinged a little. "Are you daft, man? Not hate me? You've picked on me since I first set foot in these halls!"

"And what does a boy do when he has a crush on someone?"

"Damn."

James smiled. "Shall we?"

"Where are we going?"

"Wherever you want."

"And if I want to go where everyone could see us?"

James groaned. "I guess, if you really want to."

Snape laughed. James saw the way his face could actually look…handsome. "Well, luck's on your side today, Potter. I'm not going anywhere public."

"Well, there is always the prefect's bathroom…"

Snape grinned like a maniac. "You know, I hate you."

James shrugged. "I know."

"And you're not even all that hot."

"I know." And then he swooped in and kissed Severus's cheek, grinned at his expression, and dove into the bathtub before Snape could react violently.

"So, you have to realize that you have to stop being mean to me."

"Yes."

"And so do your friends."

"Got it."

"And we may eventually have to tell everyone."

"Whatever you want. And Severus?"

"Yes?" He slicked back his shoulder length locks.

"Can I kiss you now?" He grinned at Snape's cheeks flaming and almost didn't kiss him when Snape nodded out of surprise.

But when he did…


	2. Two

Two

Severus Snape was in the prefect's bathroom, about to take a bath. He slipped off his shoes and socks, pulled off his shirt, and was about to unbutton his jeans when the door opened.

"Snape! What are you doing in here?"

"About to take a bath. What are you doing in here?" No mistaking the voice that haunted his thoughts.

"Same."

Severus Snape turned to see James Potter stripping his shirt off, shoes already gone.

"Coming?" he asked, and then there went the pants.

"Why would I undress for you?" Snape snapped.

James shrugged and stepped out of his boxers, walking calmly into the bath, turning on all the different bubble kinds.

Snape looked down, trying to avoid looking at a dangerously good-looking enemy, even at the worst of times. He lay down on the floor, no intentions of leaving. As soon as Potter was gone, he was taking his bath.

"So, Snape, tell me something."

Snape grunted, so James took it as a sign to continue.

"Why are your underpants grey?"

"Why are you such an arrogant asshole?"

"Answer my question," he replied smoothly.

"Because not all of our parents are rich, and a lot of them just don't care."

Potter was silent for a minute. Then he whispered something similar to "Sorry."

"Now you answer my question."

"Because I like someone I'm not supposed to."

Snape opened his mouth to question him, but was instead pulled into the bathtub by a pair of strong arms that easily wrapped around Snape's thin frame. He surfaced, spluttering. "Why the hell would you do that? I'm leaving." He stood up and almost made it out of the tub when James popped up behind him.

"So, you're just going to walk out there in drenched clothes?"

He folded his arms across his chest. "No."

"You can take off your jeans. It's not like I'm looking." Potter turned away, shielding his eyes.

"Fine," Snape grumbled, "since you want me naked so badly." He slipped off his wet clothes, laying them out so they would dry and dove into the bubble-filled tub. He surfaced and slicked back his black hair, the wet strands hitting his shoulders.

James reopened his eyes. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"

Snape glared. "I am not wearing any clothes and am in a bathtub with my biggest enemy, who is also naked. This doesn't look good."

"Who's looking?" James whispered.

Severus dove under, swimming silently, and came up right behind James, so close they were almost touching. "About that person."

James didn't flinch. "What person?"

"That one you're not supposed to like."

"Three guesses," he replied without turning. "One."

"Sirius."

"Nope."

"Remus."

"Hell no! Sirius and Remus are- never mind."

"Well, it's not Pettigrew."

"Nope." He whipped around. "Try again." And then he leaned forward and kissed Snape.

It was truly a Kodak moment when Snape's eyes popped open as James wound his fingers into Snape's hair.

He pulled back. "Got it yet?"

Snape nodded and leaned forward to kiss James.

Think bath time is only for Harry and Cedric?

Think again.


	3. Three

Three

Severus Snape was the kind of person who looked like he never washed.

Sometimes, he didn't because he didn't care about his appearance like some people did *coughpottercough*.

But he didn't _never_ bathe. He was in the bathtub at least once a week, usually every other day. He just was one of those people that were just greasy-looking. It wasn't necessarily his fault.

"Snivillus!"

Said Slytherin froze. "Potter," he grumbled, slowly turned on his heel, all awkward and bat-like. "What are you here for?"

"Fetching you, love." James Potter skipped over to him, all spiky black hair and bright smile. He grabbed Snape's arm and pulled the resisting sixth year with him, making it seem effortless.

Poor Snape was dragged all the way to the lake, where Sirius and Remus were lounging, the dying sun illuminating them. Peter was nowhere to be found.

"What's going on?" he snapped, suspiciously narrowing his eyes.

"Don't glare, Snape. It's not a good look for you."

Snape glared at James again. "I asked, what's going on?"

"We're playing Truth or Dare and wanted a fourth. We always have a fourth."

Snape groaned and slumped to the ground.

"Okay, Remus, you first. Truth or dare?"

Remus leaned back. "Truth."

Sirius groaned. "You're so _boring_, Moony."

Remus stuck his tongue out at Sirius. Sirius looked as if he ,might do something with that tongue.

James cleared his throat. "Okay, Moony, who was your first kiss?"

Remus colored. "I've never been kissed."

Sirius's jaw slackened. "This needs to be changed right now," he declared, pupils growing. He leaned over agonizingly slowly and chastely kissed Remus on the lips. "There we go." He grinned in Lupin's face.

Remus flushed again and pushed Sirius away. "Okay, er, Snape, Truth or dare?"

Snape said, "Truth," too afraid of what they might make him do.

"What's your sexuality?"

He blushed and stared straight into the sun so he wouldn't have to gauge their reactions. "Gay."

James immediately looked at him with interest.

"Interesting," Remus mused.

The game continued on for an hour, with incredibly private things revealed and terrible actions committed.

It was Snape's turn again.

"Truth or dare, Mr. Potionsmaster?" asked Sirius, who was grinning from his dare.

"Dare," he answered, determined.

"Okay, let's see. I dare you to…to take a bath with our dear Prongs. Right now. Run along, little lovers."

"Lovers?!"

"Come on, Snape. Best to get this over with."

Snape hid under the water, red from head to toe. When he resurfaced, his head was thrown back, the water making his hair sleek and shiny.

James hooked his eyes to him.

He'd never seen this side of "Snivillus."

"What are you looking at?" Snape snapped.

"You. What else is there else to look at in this room?"

"The mermaid."

"Yes, well, I can't say I'm all that into girls."

"What kind of guys are you into?" Snape asked, staring at the flirting mermaid.

James grinned. "Tall, dark-haired, slightly bat-like, and currently naked."

Snape's head jerked up, cheeks flaming.

"Yes, I like you, Severus."

Then there was no room to move because James was on top of him, kissing the breath right out of his lungs.

Then Snape kissed back and all was lost to passion.

From their hiding place in the prefect's bathroom, Remus and Sirius were exchanging money.

It had finally happened.


End file.
